Anxious Nightmare

We met at the coffee shop
Spoke in shaded tones
Her hair cut short
I thought she were my sister
But only at first, those eyes
Those eyes, Aniya, don’t lie
I vented about my past
And about her, she nodded
“I always loved you.”
“Even when you tried to slay me?”
I saw visions running from the knife
Twisted to memory of her and I
Fighting fiercely for my life
“Koraki, it’s past. I’m here now”
My soul aches, I feel damaged
Nightmares, the blood stained fields
I heard her voice in the distance
Though she was right across me
The world spins, I see a house
My house, empty, dark
Strangers in it, she chases them out
There my cat lays, injured severely
My brain scrambled, why why me?
We rush her to the vet yet
We never get there, my heart drops
As the road of visions it never ends
“I’m here, with you, it’s just a dream.”

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Dreamer

I understand now her silence.
Her seeming to be gone
No she is ever near
And her heart is ever strong
I understand the misread cues
Alas I tread careful
Not to lead along the blossom
But my heart is ever tied
To the weight of her lone petals
The dreamer that I am
And if Buddha were to smile
Down at me know I’d be blessed
Ever knowing that it is all
Not in vain, no I’ll live
As dreamer always do
Ever embracing the dream

To live

The world fades from view
The sky darkens and I slip
Into a slumber eternal
When do we wake again?
Will I see you in that world?
Alas I can only hope you wait
There with your golden hair
On that side, Dear Ellewyn
And when we do I know
Two sweet grey cats
and my loving Calico sit
With you across that bridge
The world slips until that day
A blur of grief and joys
Until I must remember to live

Vaulted Heart

Lady, I love you.
The dreams they don’t leave me.
I keep dreaming, the soldier fighting the eternal war inside.
The corpse king
standing at the edge of a cliff,
the cave yawns in the mountian. Princess are you there?
Will you lend Koraki your wings.
Fly to freedom,
fly from this dark place
where we can’t hide.
All eyes on us here,
their judgement creeps ever near. Come, my dragon queen,
I’ll hide our love, secret, safe,
in the vault of my heart.

Heartless (2017)

you haunt my dreams
I try to escape you
It wasn’t easy to up and leave
I cried, ached, screamed it’s true
My soul was dying, letting go
Leaving the one I loved so much
You were part of my soul, it wasn’t easy
To know we may lose touch
I’ll be another face in the crowd
I had to fiegn easy
Fake that this didn’t hurt
Kill the urge ever inside me
To message I love you every morning
Like I use to when it was “us”
It hurts to pretend it never was
You think otherwise but it does
So why carry on like it was nothing?
Acknowledging what we once were
Hurts so much more than this
And that’s why I act heartless

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Where My Beloved? (2013)

Where are you my beloved
I slept for many an eon
The ache for you is deep inside
I bury the desires, try to hide
The love leads to longing
This longing pleasant suffering
My joy is in her smile
My delight is the touch of her skin
Honour in serving her, unseen
To call her my beloved queen
This is the knight’s pleasure
And as Wesley in princess bride
Is known to say, “As you wish.”
Is my eternal answer
For every order my retort
Is my devotion for her
Where are you my beloved
That this Knight may say
“I love you,” and hold you
Forever here in dreams

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