My Moon, Tsuki

By Damien Knight

I, the raven of despair, shan’t lament
I will not cry, I finally told you go
If you felt so strong at my dream
Then perhaps it was for you meant

Will I never know the lady of shadows
If you were she and I broke you more
I do not deserve her ever to find me
You insisted, and I will never know

Beautiful long emery hair to break me
Those emerald eyes, seas of my agony
Ruby painted lips to break my soul
My stone heart sealed I shan’t be free

Do you despise me? I shall see soon
For if your hate for my mistaken love
Grew true, if you scorn my cold heart
Tsuki, I know you will be well my moon

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Monday Motivation: Character

By Damien Knight

 

When we think of motivation, we talk a lot about light, moving into the light, seeking light, pursuing it. Light is always the goal. We then view struggle as our enemy and emotions as weapons against us. Pain, suffering, depression, we become swallowed in our cycle of pity and anguish and only light can save us. This, this then leads us to struggling to find light, light of course being happiness, prosperity and normalcy. We fight darkness, but is it our enemy?

I was evicted back in March 2017; the land-lord had tried several times to evict me for various claims and I finally stopped fighting her. I won’t claim I embraced despair. No one does but at this same time I had watched The Secret and I desperately wanted to believe in the power of attraction. I had put out to the universe that I wanted a house; I knew I had a lease I couldn’t break and, yet the universe found a way for me to break my lease.

So far, no darkness, but then I was unable to find a place, and I ended up essentially squatting in a house that had a bad roof and no floors in the kitchen. I loved the house itself and part of me wanted to buy it, but it wasn’t feasible. After just a month a familiar friend appeared. Depression, loneliness, despair. I have experienced many dark times in my past but this recent one I feel is where I mastered not fighting the darkness of agony.
For:

character

I have suffered many “Character Building” events. Truly to pursue the light one must stop fighting darkness and use it to build your character. Side note if you suffer clinical illness do not take my words to mean you should stop medicines. Please remember that medicine is a tool to keep us going just as much as any other means of motivation and for some it is what keeps us alive. STAY MOTIVATED!

 

 

A Desperate Dream

By Damien Knight

 

I loved like no other man but my heart was shattered!

She was my desire, my every dream.

Waking is a nightmare, finding her not real.

Despair would fill every crevice, every seam.

Ebony haired, emerald eyes, ruby lips

my hands reach desperation on my fingertips.

Craving her voice like a lost ballad

the denial of her leaves my skin pallid.

How can I breathe when she takes my air?

Don’t you know how wretched I am

waking alone in sweat soaked despair?

I look in every pair of eyes I see

alas when will I see that angel face?

Have pity on this poor basket case

I cannot sleep any more, eyes encircled

all because of that beauty I marveled

If only I could never wake again

I would stay forever there with Ana.

Weeping when the night ends

for seeing her is life manna.