My Light (Written Dec 25 2011)

Takes time to heal
Slowly I feel better
The pain is difficult
after years of angry living
to try to live in love
alas I was born to this bleak world
Dark all around forced to find
my own hidden light
with that dear friends
Have a happy holiday
and a good night

Advertisements

Fighting to Live

Curse the daylight which illuminates
The dark recesses of my mind.
How I long for eternal rest!
My soul unable to escape my self-hate.

Who can stand a man of such despair?
To end the joke that is my life
Would be the most pertinent thing to do!
Close my eyes and die! It’s only fair!

Yet here I am living, as I must!
Fighting the demons plaguing my existence.
Ever lingering, they drown me!
Who is there? Is there a love I can trust?

Yesterday was International Transgender Day of visibility. I posted on my personal facebook about it but nothing on the blog. This poem and another I am working on addresses the emotions I have gone through as I have transitioned. The suicide rate for trans people is much higher than the general population and I am no stranger to the desire to die yet here I am ALIVE! Many never make it so not only do I wish to present myself as a visible trans person I wish to remember those who have passed either from suicide or murdered. Let us celebrate, let us grieve and let us live and love just as everyone else.

Want to help with transition costs? Donate here : The Shadow’s Journey

Do you like our poems? Remember to support us on Patreon

Blood Bliss (Nov 1, 2009)

This poem is ancient. I wrote it so long ago that I found it not on facebook or computer files but in a note book near a drawing of my 10 year old daughter as a baby! It’s a sort of depressed creepy fantasy vampire poem. Makes me wonder what else is tucked away in notebooks.

If it rained blood
I knew someone died
If it fell on me
I wouldn’t cry

If it rained wine
I wouldn’t care
Heck that be divine
But it rains blood

It pours from the sky
Makes earth a living hell
Covers every inch
And pools in the drinking well

I lower the bucket
To take in a drink
Absorbing life from horror
I stand at the brink

Of what is good and evil
Yet, like other men
I’ll do what I please
I follow my own command

But I’m not fit for happiness
Destruction is my joy
blood becomes my bliss
I will wake in sorrow again

Unsteady (2011)

By Damien Knight

Bleeding wrists can’t match a bleeding Heart
The darkness inside tears me apart
I yearn to wake from this nightmare
Life plagues me it seems unfair
Living in a twisted mire of lies
Is the the man I am inside
One that cannot be saved
Should I dig my own grave
I won’t let myself drown
I won’t be kept down
My heart will heal my soul will thrive
I am grateful to just be alive

Do you like our poems? Remember to support us on Patreon

Only Me (2012)

By Damien Knight

Shutting out the world today,
closing up my heart, what can I say
closing out sound and all around me.
I didn’t understand but now I believe
In the beginning and at the end
We have only ourselves as a friend
From now on I must remind myself
I can only rely on myself.
Others will not be at my side
No one comes with me when I die

Do you like our poems? Remember to support us on Patreon