By Damien Knight
I am not in love.
This is different
than being in love.
I’m not just dreaming,
no I am scheming.
The guilt of this,
Longing and thinking.
The desire: forgiveness.
When I was certain
I’d fallen, I was high
No drop of the curtain
Hits me now, stone sober.
I feel unchanged, free.
Free and fully guilty.
I can’t handle it still
But my heart must.
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I know it’s you, though you denied it. Wish I had never read this blog. I would have continued to think you HATE me.
I am not going to come and write here again. I don’t wish to talk to somebody in the name of you.
Still can’t believe myself that I am doing this. May be my feelings are true for you.
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Before I stop writing here again. I wonder how did I discover this blog. The girl who doesn’t even bother to read friends messages has landed on unknown blog site. What made me to come and read all this.
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I keep reading every comment you post over and over for a hint. Is it a lover I have scorned? No, it can’t be, what girl would believe that I could hate her. I only knew one who thought that and I set her straight I was sure. So who are you? How did you find me? Are you even reading these replies?
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I need to confess today.
I have tried my best to forget you and have failed at it. When I think of you my heart starts beating so fast. The feeling which I never felt for anybody.
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I thought a lot. If I don’t tell you today then I cannot forgive myself. I have always loved you and still love you. Only difference is you found a way to tell it to me, but I couldn’t tell it. I kept it to myself. So no need to feel Guilty.
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How are you? worried about you. Just let me know you are OK.
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who denied what. no one has confronted me about this blog I’d know
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